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5.21.2013

Au Pairs who make me have homicidal thoughts.


Hallo! How is going, girls?

Oh Stephy, who are those au pairs? OMG, are you gonna start killing people? - They are every where, making host families go crazy and join the dark side. They, my dear, are mostly the main reason why a host family can turn out to be very strict and full of rules for this and that. And, no, as much as I wish I could actually give them some physical punishment to see if, perhaps, their brains would start working properly. Just because they are destroying a great part of my good brain cells, it would not be considered self-defense if I hit them with a guitar in the head, (said, right? :( ), but, hey, I do it mentally !

I will share with you some of the stories I heard, and actually know the au pair, so that you can see how the behave of the previous au pair can affect your year quality and relationship with your new host family. 


  • - The car RULES! - "I want the car in the garage by 10pm" 

Rules for the care are the worse. Au PAIRS need a car! It is basically our only way of getting our free time from everything with out being depended of other people's good will. 

Some host families are so strict about the car rules that it becomes impossible for the au pair to enjoy her free time because sometimes there is no way to go by bus, or train, or the friend who said would pick her up let her down on the last minute. Enjoying our free time is one of the most important parts of the program. Au Pairs are always stressed and want to get away all the time, but if the host family keeps controlling the car she might miss out on cool events and opportunities of having fun. Of course, she will blame the host family, and probably she is not gonna work with a smile on her face for awhile. I believe that a happy au pair works better, meaning that a happy au pair results in happy children because she transmits such happiness by taking good care of them, being more active and playing more often with them. 

The reason why some host families become so worried about the car rules is because of those au pairs I mentioned on the first paragraph. Those au pairs did everything wrong that you could possible imagine with the car, RESULTING in a host family with trusting issues and a long list of car rules such as curfew, amount of miles allowed to drive, rationing the gas, not parking on the streets, not allowed to drive friends, and so on. 

For ex, I know an au pair who were really irresponsible with the family car. I knew her host family as well, so I can vote for them regarding they were really nice (way too nice) to her. They were so nice that they would pay a nanny for the weekends, so that their au pair could have free time. Funny fact is that she did not  have to work the 45h at all. It was only about 25h a week, and yet they wanted to make sure she had time to enjoy her staying in the USA as much as she could. Also, they offered  to sponsor her working visa, and  to give her a job in their company, plus college expenses. Instead of embracing this amazing importunity,  she abandoned the program, and if  that was not enough she also says horrible things that are not true about them all the time for whoever wants or not to hear it. She was constantly drunk and partying over the weekends. Well that is not our business, or the host family's, but from the time she drove their car drunk  and got tons of tickets, the family had all the right to ask her to be more responsible. Otherwise, she would lose the right of driving their ca for personal matters. Instead of listening, she got really furious with their attitude, and abandoned the program. She married a guy she had just met (like a week before that), and moved in with him. After that, the host family got a new au pair, who I know, and they have this huge book of rules for everything. It is kind of crazy, but if you think about it, how can they know if the new au pair is just like the previous? You may think "Well, they should trust the new one cause people are different", yeas, but what if she is like the previous one? When your kids and your car, and someone else's well being is on line, you can't risk it. The previous one was lucky that she never got into a big accident, but that can happen in the future any time. After some time, the new au pair turned out to be way different from the crazy one,  and she earned their trust. Now the car rules are almost gone. Unfortunately, some host families might not change after being hurt for the first time, so the new au pair will have to live with the rules generated by the mistakes of a crazy au apair which is really not fair. 



  • - NO Friends in MY HOUSE! - "I trust you, actually I don't, but I don't trust your friends as well."

Being away from your friends who you left behind is hard, but some host families can make it even harder when they don't let you bring any of the friends you are trying so hard to make to their precious houses. 

Some of them say "I trust you but not them" - that is crap, my dear. If they trusted you, they would trust your judgement for choosing who you want to hang out with, and who you want to tell your secrets for. Maybe they do trust you, but are hell scared of someone they don't know entering their lives,  and they are even more scared to ask you about them cause they are afraid that you will think they are trying to control your life. However, most families are just tired of trusting au pairs and having a disappointment after another. For ex, this au pair who won the trophy for "Crazy au pair of the month" simply threw are party while the host family was gone on vacation. Did she ask them to do it? Nope! Did she tell them she would? Nope. What happened? She did this big party, the house got all crapped, and neighbors told the host family right away. Her guests drank the host dad's expensive drinks, and the carpet that once was white looked more like mud. 
The host family, very nice, just told her to never do that again, they paid for everything and did not punish her or cut her benefits out.  

Did she stop there? Nope. She once saw one of her teen (12 yo) host kids drinking alcohol with a friend while the parents were on a date night. Instead of stopping them, and telling the parents about the situation, she said "Oh well, just don't let your parents find out, hehehe". Was that all? Nope, the family gave her a  credit card for groceries shopping. Because they trusted her, they never asked for receipts as long as she would only use it on the supermarket. She used their credit cards for buying make up and other stuff for herself with out even thinking that this was stealing. She told me "AH, they are rich and they don't ask for the receipt. It is ok" . Then, the next time they went on vacation, she stole their credit card, left a letter saying good bye in the mail box, used the credit card to pay for her extra suitcase's fees, and flew back to her home country. 

Now, this host family is full of rules for the house. Before they did not care about having  friends over. They would even let the au pair buy pizza with their money. Now, no friends allowed, no credit card for the au pair to buy the food she likes, and new car rules. She literally made the new au pair's life miserable. 


Why do I get so crazy about this kind of thing? Well, I am a good au pair, I respect rules, and I do everything do way it is supposed to be done, but I had a bad experience with a mean host family. I just can't understand how someone can be so dumb to throw away such good host families like that, and just do not care about anything at all. There are so many good girls like me who deserve to have a host family that respects you and trusts you, but those crazy au pairs damage them before we can even get to them. To make things worse, they can even damage the reputation of other au pairs by associating nationalities, for ex, brazilians are famous for being late all the time. I am super on time and hate being late, but because I am brazilian, my host family first host family thought I would be late all the time cause they had a brazilian au pair that was super late for everything. Then they made me get to places about an hour before, and that really annoyed me cause an hour plus half an hour of driving is way to much. 

I have more stories that I could use as an example, but the post is pretty long already and I think you got the main idea. Be careful with the things you do because
they do not only affect you but also the next innocent au pair. In the next post I will talk about how your behave can turn them into lazy and very accommodated people as well.

Hope  you enjoyed the post! Please like our page on facebook to be updated when there is new posts! See ya! -



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5.09.2013

The Advantages of Hiring an Au Pair


Hello my ladies, How is it going? 

So, I received this very interesting article by e-mail about a month ago. They asked me if I would like to share it with you guys, but I totally forgot about it. I am sorry for being that absent from the blog lately  (I will make a post about it because it might be helpful for some Au pair who want to start an academic life in the USA. )

I will paste the article below. I read it, and I think it was very well written. I strongly agree with most of the points made. However, it is totally about the host family advantages. 

I am thinking, what are the advantages of being an Au Pair? Why should someone leave hers/his country to be a nanny overseas? Why did you choose this Au Pair life? Besides all the crap  cliche that every girl say when being interviewed by host families such as "Oh cause you have the opportunity of learning a new culture, meet new people, and travel" - Ok I agree with all of that, but most girls have another reason. Some are trying to get away from family problems, some want to send money back to help their family and so on... 

My reason? Hmmm, it as the cheapest way of entering the USA! Honestly, I love my kids and my host family, but if I had the founds for supporting my self on a student visa and only, I would never ever choose the au poor life. What about you? 

Ladies, that is your homework for today! Post a comment explaining your point of view about the subject. I believe the answers and comments from you girls would make a beautiful and helpful post for other girls who are undecided if they should adventure themselves into being an au pair or stay in their comfort zone, aka Mommy's house. 

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The Advantages of Hiring an Au Pair



Parents have two choices when hiring an in-home caregiver: a nanny or an au pair. Although sometimes the two titles are used interchangeably, they are very different types of caregivers. Nannies are caregivers, either live-in or live-out, that are responsible for meeting the developmental needs of the child and taking on child-related household responsibilities. They are hired as employees directly by the parents. On the other hand, au pairs are foreign caregivers that are placed with host families through the Department of State. Rather than an employee/employer relationship, au pairs are part of a cultural exchange program, and are welcomed as part of the family from the start. They receive a weekly stipend, the opportunity to experience American life and the chance to continue their education while they’re in our country in exchange for childcare. Although there are restrictions on the number of hours an au pair can work and what duties she can perform, there are lots of advantages to au pair care too. Here’s a look at what many families love about having an au pair.
An au pair can teach your child a foreign language. In today’s world, children who are bi- or multi-lingual have a strong advantage over children who only know English. An au pair can teach her native language to your child, or she can reinforce and expand his language skills if he’s already learning the language in school or from a relative. Because she is also fluent in English, she’s able to communicate with you and your child from the start and introduce her language slowly or provide a complete immersion experience. She’ll be able to approach it in a way that’s best suited to your child.
Your family can experience a different culture through an au pair. Your au pair can introduce your family to the language, customs and history of her country in a way that brings it to life. You’ll get to learn about life in a different part of the world through the experiences of someone who’s grown up and lived there. This can be especially exciting for school age children who may be learning about the au pair’s country in school. She can support your child’s formal learning with unique stories, crafts, cooking and other activities from her background. This is a much more fun and personal way to learn about a foreign land.
It’s an affordable childcare option. Because au pairs are paid a weekly stipend instead of a typical nanny’s wage, this option makes in-home care affordable for many families. While there are some restrictions on what you can ask of an au pair, she can work up to 10 hours a day or 45 hours a week, can provide hands-on childcare and can do many child-related household tasks, like preparing the children’s meals, doing their laundry and keeping the their areas tidy. This lines up with what many families need from a childcare provider, so for many it’s a perfect fit.
You don’t have to take on the nanny tax hassles. While most au pairs are required to pay state and federal taxes at the end of the year, as the host you’re not required to pay Social Security taxes or other employer taxes like unemployment. This means that you don’t have to deal with the time consuming hassles that come with being a household employer.
An au pair has childcare experience and training. Although au pairs are young men and women, all must have childcare experience before entering the program. Also, all au pairs are required to satisfactorily complete a childcare training program before being placed with a host family. So you can be assured that your au pair has a solid foundation of childcare knowledge before she comes to live with your family. This ensures she’s ready to take on the daily responsibilities of caring for your children.
There’s a strong support network for the au pair and host family. When you welcome an au pair into your home, it’s the beginning of a long-term relationship with both the au pair and the organization that placed her. She’ll have a counselor that will help her adjust to the American lifestyle, connect her with other au pairs in her local area and also be there to deal with any questions or problems she has. The au pair organization also provides support to you as you go through the natural challenges of welcoming an au pair into your home. Having this professional, ongoing resource can be a huge help in making the relationship a success and getting the most out of the experience.
Hosting an au pair isn’t for everyone. But for many families, it’s the perfect in-home childcare option and cultural exchange experience, all rolled into one.


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